The Parenting Pagan
Dr Raven Dolick MsD
Apr 1, 2016
All rights reserved
2016 RavenStar Enchantments
It's never easy raising children.
You have a greater responsibility to the health, well being, and physical condition of your child than anyone else. Today, it's easier for parents to rely on others to help them monitor interests, than it is to sit down and talk with your children. But you also have a responsibility to their mental conditioning as well. There's nothing new about this concept. There are a huge number of books, magazines and even web sites offering advice for the best way to talk to your child.
That isn't the purpose of this posting however. My purpose here is to merely give non-pagan parents an understanding or insight into how to handle, deal with and work with a child with interests in magick and/or witchcraft.
Mutual Respect
The first comment I feel a need to pass on to all parents is: if you want your children to respect you and your wishes; then you must start with respecting their thoughts and interests. You can't control what a person thinks. No matter how hard you try.
That doesn't mean agreeing with their interests or condoning their actions, but it does mean having the ability to talk with them and LISTENING to what they say, how they say it and being open to their thoughts.
The worst thing anyone can do to a child is not listening. All you will accomplish is creating a situation where the child will begin hiding their interests, and deceiving you. This is dangerous to both the child and to you! Without listening, you could easily miss an underlying message of pain or sadness which unchecked, could lead to some seriously dangerous behavior.
With that said, and once again, this article focuses on spiritual beliefs and mystical interests. Nothing else. It's meant to give parents information about the path of Witchcraft, what it is and what it isn't. It's better to work with your child to help them research, so that they can find the most accurate and best information; instead of trying to control their thoughts and creating a situation where your child could become involved in a group that has no clue what they're talking about. Or worse, who only wish to control and abuse your child.
These kinds of groups exist in ALL religions. The best way to provide safety for your child is to help them research and steer clear of wannabe false priests/priestess. To do that, you need to know a little too.
How Did It Happen
As a spiritual leader and teacher, I'm often asked to talk with parents and teachers about the path of the craft. After many years of counseling, I can predict the questions I'm about to be asked.
So here are quick frequently asked questions - and some answers that will clear up much mis-information.
• Why did my child get interested in this?
There are as many answers for this as there are children on the planet.
o Rebellion of parents and authority.
o Friends at school
o Dissatisfaction with fundamental religions and ideals
o A general curiosity that became a real interest
o How about asking the child?
• How did my child find out about this?
Again, friends and the media are often the sources of much information that influence our children.
With movies like "The Craft", "Practical Magick" and TV shows like "Charmed" and "Sabrina Teenage Witch", there are bound to be children who see the "fantasy" and want to be special. The real side of Witchcraft is nothing like this Hollywood version however.
• We're not evil, why do they want to do this?
First of all Witchcraft and magick ARE NOT evil. We don't worship the devil or negative Gods. In fact, the religion of Witchcraft is very unfavorable about those who practice negative actions toward other living things. Mystical beliefs have existed throughout history. Have a curiosity isn't evil as long as it follows a real path of honest research and study.
• What can we do to get them out of this cult stuff?
By definition, even Christianity and Judaism are cults. Check the dictionary for cult and you'll see what I mean. There are just as many Christian or Hebrew 'brainwashing' cults as there are, excuse the phrase, flaky cults. Witchcraft is not about 'brain washing', controlling or manipulating people. In fact, it is a religion based wholeheartedly in respect. Violating that concept is equivalent to a major sin. So it's something we really don't approve of.
After you have talked with your child and learned a little about the craft path; perhaps your sincerity of respect in their interests will also encourage your children to respect your wishes as well. You're not going to be able to control your child's thoughts and beliefs. But who said you can't use their beliefs to help you through discipline and reciprocal respect.
• What do we do now?
Once again learn a little bit about what the religion of Witchcraft is, so you can speak with your child with some level of understanding. Your efforts might even impress them enough to listen to you. Imagine that.
If you still feel the need to control their actions and interests, then this article has failed. But I'd ask for you to at least respect your child and calmly tell them you are uncomfortable with their interest in this religion. Out of respect or your wishes, would they please stop? Demanding to control their beliefs isn't going to work. Remember when you were a kid? Demands will only send your children underground into hiding their beliefs and actions. Where you cannot protect them.
If your child is still interested in the path of the craft, the best thing you can do is help them research for valid information. This will put your mind at ease by knowing what they’re doing, and with whom. But it will also help you both learn about the misconceptions, misinformation and even the propaganda that can be dangerous.
Please remember that pagan paths are not where the dangers lie.
Within ALL religions, there are fanatics and people who wish to control and manipulate others. By respecting the interests of your child, you will gain their trust and maybe even learn a little along the way yourself. Learning about other religions and cultures doesn't take anything away from your beliefs or way of life. It merely gives you an understanding and maybe even a little tolerance.
What Are The Dangers
As within any religion, there are people and organizations whose only interest is control, manipulation and greed. The religion of witchcraft is no different. But they're a little easier to spot.
The biggest problems today are the many people who are newly interested in the craft path who think they've learned enough to be teachers. These people are often misinformed, or know just enough to be dangerous. Mostly because their concepts or understandings are only partially developed.
They base their concepts on two or three books, movies or turn of the 19th century writings that are filled with misconceptions in themselves. The only real way to spot the dangers is to learn the basics of what Witchcraft really is.
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